Every marriage contains its share of ups and downs. Let’s face it. Two people living under the same roof sharing and learning the most intimate details about each other often takes superhuman effort. Whether both personalities are strong or one is more dominant than the other is beside the point. Constant contact has the ability to create an environment that in one minute is love personified and in the next tension filled to the point of unbearable.
This means that more than likely there is a good “healthy” dosage of arguing with the relationship. Of course this can cover anything from mundane household chores, the current economic state of the family or who left the jelly out all night. The list as you probably already know is almost limitless.
Burt when it comes to a cheating spouse, that healthy dosage can quickly turn into an overdose. Now it seems like no matter what the discussion or circumstances here comes another argument. You have always accepted the fact that your relationship has enjoyed or endured a certain amount of back and forth but it has gotten to the point of ridiculous and understandably it is wearing you out.
So why all the anger from a cheating spouse? A couple of possibilities may provide the answer.
1. Guilt
Knowing that they have shattered their marriage vows (and that is exactly what cheating comes down to) may be doing a serious number on a cheating partner’s emotions and psyche. Not to the point where they end the extramarital affair but to the level where they need a scapegoat for their wrongdoing. Conveniently that is where you come in. It’s hard for some of us to look in the mirror and accept responsibility for our own actions. You can see this first hand with many people who cannot bring themselves to apologize for anything.
The same goes with a cheating spouse. They would not be having an affair if only you had tried to be more understanding or more intimate or more whatever. The point is you pushed them into this situation which has manifested itself into more arguing. Not being able to admit fault takes gumption and a definite amount of emotional immaturity.
2. You Are In The Way
They feel no guilt at all. They just want what they want and you are standing in the way. It does not necessarily mean they want a divorce but frankly your hanging around the house is a great inconvenience to them. Or if they are at work and you call them just to see how their day is going can trigger an argument. It may seem perfectly innocent to you; in fact you have always done this. It of course may mean they are just having a bad day but in a cheating spouse’s mind it can also translate into that you are directly interfering with their plans.
Very few couples go thru a marriage without ever arguing. Some experts believe the right kind of arguments can strengthen the relationship. That is possible but constant arguing is an emotion and physical drain. If it is happening more than usual than it may indicate deeper problems. You always hope that it has nothing to do with marriage infidelity but pay close attention just to make sure.
Ghosts
