While they may not be one hundred percent full proof means of detection, most of us are familiar with the telltale signs of cheating spouse. They can range from longer work hours which occur with alarming frequency, unexplained and sudden changes in habits and physical appearance or a sudden shift in the dynamics of your relationship including a noticeable lack of communication or more arguments which seem to manifest out of nowhere.
A cheating spouse can exhibit all of these symptoms or none of them depending on how careful they are playing it. No one is perfect but since it takes a large degree of ingenuity to carry on an extramarital affair, catching them can be difficult.
Yet there is one sign that all too often gets overlooked when discussing a cheating spouse. And that is, it takes money to carry on an extramarital affair.
Ruth Houston an Infidelity expert who has appeared on the Today Show, CNN, Fox News, and in countless newspapers around the country describes it this way, “If a man is involved in an extramarital affair, sooner or later it will be reflected in the family finances. A cheating husband will resort to financial infidelity so he can cover up the fact that he’s spending money on his mistress. Affairs cost money.”
That of course also applies to any woman that is cheating on her husband but the point is clear. The spouse and the other person may enjoy the physical intimacy and in the beginning that maybe all that is required but eventually romance without finance will bring any relationship (particularly an extramarital one) to an end.
So what can you watch for? In this day and age it will probably come down to the credit card statement.
We live in a society where having credit has become an absolute necessity. In many instances credit is more widely acceptable then having the actual cash to pay for it. Therefore when the billing statement arrives from Visa, MasterCard, Amex or whoever, give it a thorough review. See if there’s anything on there that is unexplained. If you are in charge of the family finances so much the better. You can easily ask your spouse about certain charges without arousing their suspicions since paying the bills is your responsibility. If it’s not your job start checking it out anyway. When it comes to household finances both parties should be involved in some capacity or another. Leaving it all to one person, especially if that person is doing the cheating, is just asking to be left in the dark.
If you do notice something you can always confront your partner right away but sometimes it’s better to wait and see if this is a pattern. Having an “Aha!” moment at the first sign of a suspicious charge can do more harm than good particularly if your significant other has a reasonable explanation. If they do than your lack of trust has been exposed, which can lead to all sorts of complications.
Finances are one of the foundations in any relationship. You can only go so far on love and wishful thinking. That includes marital infidelity. It not only requires time and energy but capital. We live in a credit based world so if you have your doubts in regards to your spouse’s faithfulness than start checking those credit card statements. It may not be a full proof system but it can go a long way in confirming your suspicions.
Shadow People
